10 things nobody tells you about having children

 

Having children is one of the most rewarding experiences in life, but it also comes with a lot of challenges and surprises. It can be difficult to know what to expect when you're embarking on the journey of parenthood, so here are 10 things nobody tells you about having children. From the physical toll it takes to the emotional rollercoaster you'll experience, this post will help prepare you for the unexpected twists and turns that come with raising children.

 

1) Kids are expensive

Having children is a rewarding and joyous experience, but it can also be expensive. Raising a child costs an average of $233,610 up until the age of 18, according to the U.S. Department of Agriculture’s 2019 report. That’s over 13% higher than what it was 10 years ago!

Childcare and education costs have seen the most significant increases, with childcare costing three times more in 2018 than it did in 2008. Education is also becoming increasingly expensive, as tuition costs have risen by almost 30% in the last decade. As a parent, it’s important to be aware of these rising costs and budget accordingly.

In addition to childcare and education, you’ll need to factor in clothing, food, health insurance, extracurricular activities and other necessities. It’s easy to underestimate how much all of these costs will add up over time, so it’s important to plan ahead and save where possible. Setting aside money for your children’s future will give you peace of mind and ensure that they have the resources they need to succeed.

 

2) You'll never sleep again

Having a child is an amazing experience. It is filled with joy, laughter, and unconditional love. But there are some things that no one tells you about having children that can be hard to accept. One of these is the fact that you will never sleep again!

Having a baby means having to sacrifice precious sleep. Whether it’s long nights of comforting a crying baby, early morning wake-ups, or midnight feedings, you will never get a full night’s sleep again. Even when your baby starts sleeping through the night, there will still be times when he or she will wake up for no reason, causing you to have to start all over again.

It’s also important to remember that being a parent is an ongoing commitment. Babies grow and change quickly, so you’ll always have something new to learn and adjust to. This means that you’ll be exhausted from more than just lack of sleep - you’ll also be exhausted from constantly trying to keep up with your child’s changing needs.

The lack of sleep that comes with having a child can be difficult to cope with at first, but it’s important to remember that this is a normal part of being a parent. You may feel tired now, but the joy and love that comes with parenting makes it all worth it.

 

3) Your social life will change

Having children is one of life’s greatest joys, but there are a few things nobody tells you about it. One thing that may come as a surprise is that your social life will change drastically.

Gone are the days of carefree nights out with friends, late-night dinners, and spontaneous weekend trips. Having children requires a lot of commitment and planning, which means most of your social activities will revolve around your children.

You may also find yourself spending more time with other parents who are going through similar experiences. While this can be a great way to build a supportive network, it can also mean that you spend less time with your non-parent friends.

Your relationship with your spouse may also be affected. Raising children together can create tension and disagreements, so it’s important to make time for each other away from the kids to keep the spark alive.

Overall, having children will change your social life in ways you may not have expected. But with a bit of planning and dedication, you can make sure you still have meaningful relationships with your friends and family – both with and without kids.

 

4) You'll never have a clean house again

Having children means you will always be surrounded by toys, clothes, and other messes. You’ll never have a clean house again - and that's ok! If you focus on making your home comfortable for your family, and prioritize quality time together, you’ll soon learn to accept and even love the chaos of parenting.

It’s important to have a system in place for tidying up and cleaning up the messes that come with having children. Invest in some good storage solutions to keep all the toys off the floor, and make sure everyone is pitching in to help around the house. Take advantage of any opportunity to spend a few minutes tidying up and it will help manage the clutter.

The key is to accept the mess as part of parenting. Embrace it and remember that every mess is a sign of a happy family. Your home will never look like it did before kids, but that doesn’t mean it can’t still be filled with love and joy.

 

5) You'll always be tired

Having children is a wonderful experience, but it also comes with plenty of challenges. One of the biggest things that nobody tells you about having children is just how incredibly tired you're going to be. For the first few months, you might feel like you’re running on empty and it can seem like there's no end in sight.

It’s important to make sure that you prioritize getting rest when you can, even if it’s just for a few minutes here and there. Take advantage of any opportunity to take a nap, whether it’s during the day or late at night after the kids are in bed. Taking care of yourself is key, so don’t feel guilty for taking time for yourself.

It’s also important to remember that being tired doesn’t last forever. As your child grows and develops, your sleep schedule will eventually stabilize and you’ll begin to get more rest. You just need to keep hanging in there and taking care of yourself in the meantime.

 

6) You'll have to give up some of your hobbies

Having children will inevitably mean having to give up some of your hobbies and leisure activities. While the joys of parenthood far outweigh any sacrifices, it is important to be prepared for the ways your life will change once your little one arrives.

For starters, you’ll probably have to say goodbye to nights out with friends or spontaneous trips. You’ll need to plan ahead to make sure your child is taken care of while you’re away, or even just so that you can find a sitter. You’ll also likely need to cut back on activities like shopping or going to the movies, as taking a child along can be difficult and disruptive.

Your social life may also take a hit as many of your friends without children may not understand why you can’t go out at a moment’s notice. Though you can still maintain relationships with them, it’s important to establish a new network of other parents who are in the same stage of life as you.

Your free time is also likely to be drastically different than before. While you’ll still have time for yourself, you’ll probably have to make it a priority to spend quality time with your child. Whether it’s playing games, reading books, or doing crafts, be prepared for a lot of cuddle time.

All in all, having children is an incredibly rewarding experience but it does require some adjustments. Though it can be hard to part with some of your favorite activities, you’ll be able to find joy in new activities that you share with your child.

 

7) You'll have less free time

When you become a parent, it’s important to be aware that your free time will diminish greatly. It’s not something anyone likes to talk about, but the reality is that having children means that your leisure time will likely become much more limited.

It’s not just the actual time spent caring for your children that takes away from your free time; it’s also the associated tasks like grocery shopping, cleaning up around the house, and running errands. You may find yourself wishing for an extra hour or two in the day to fit it all in.

But even though it may feel like all of your free time has gone out the window, it doesn’t have to be a negative thing. With some creative scheduling and planning, you can still find time to do the things you love. For example, if you’re a runner, consider getting up earlier in the morning to fit in your run before the kids get up. Or if you prefer to work out after dinner, try having dinner ready an hour earlier so you can squeeze in a quick workout before bed.

Having children is a wonderful thing and comes with its own rewards, but it’s important to know that your free time will be impacted significantly. Plan ahead and make time for yourself whenever possible.

 

8) You'll have to make some sacrifices

Having a child is one of life's greatest gifts, but it can also come with some unexpected sacrifices. As a parent, you're in charge of looking after your little one's needs and making sure they have everything they need to grow into a healthy and happy individual. While the rewards of parenting are plentiful, there are some things that nobody tells you about having children that you'll need to keep in mind.

1. Your Sleep Schedule Will be Shattered: Raising a young child means saying goodbye to the idea of sleeping through the night, as there will likely be multiple wake-up calls throughout the night, at least during the early years. While this can be taxing, it's important to remember that these nights won't last forever and that quality sleep will return eventually.

2. You May Need to Take Time Off Work: When your child is sick or has school holidays, you may need to take time off work to care for them. This can be a big challenge for working parents, as it may mean taking unpaid leave or having to use up valuable vacation days.

 

9) Your relationship will change

Having children changes everything. One of the most significant changes is the transformation of your relationship with your partner. While having a child can bring you closer together, it can also put immense strain on your relationship.

The transition to parenthood can be challenging and often leaves couples feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. You may find yourself feeling resentful or frustrated with your partner for their lack of help, or you may feel guilty for not being able to do enough to support them. It’s important to remember that every couple’s journey into parenthood is different and no two experiences are the same.

It's important to take time to talk about how you’re both feeling and make sure you are communicating with each other about your needs. This can help prevent arguments and tension in the home and ensure that your relationship remains strong and healthy.

Making time for yourselves as a couple is essential too. Even if it's just a few hours a week, taking some time out of parenting to reconnect with each other can help you keep your relationship strong during this time of transition. Don't forget that at the end of the day, your relationship with your partner is just as important as the one you have with your child.

 

10) It's worth it

Having children is one of the most rewarding and life-altering experiences that one can have. Yet, so much of what to expect is often left unsaid. Here are 10 things nobody tells you about having children:

1. There will be moments of overwhelming joy. Every milestone your child reaches and every smile that graces their face will fill your heart with an indescribable joy.

2. You'll worry more than ever before. As a parent, you'll worry about the safety of your child, their future, and the decisions they make.

3. You will become incredibly busy. With childcare, school runs, activities, and everything else on your plate, you'll find that you don't have nearly as much free time as you used to.

4. You'll experience a lot of guilt. You may feel guilty for having to go to work and not being able to spend as much time with your children as you'd like.

5. You'll need to be more organized than ever before. With so many things going on, it's important to stay organized to ensure that nothing gets overlooked or forgotten.

6. Your relationship with your partner may change. Having children can put a strain on relationships, so it's important to keep communication open and ensure you still make time for each other as a couple.

7. You'll experience a wide range of emotions. From joy to sadness, worry to contentment, you'll go through the gamut of emotions as a parent.

8. You'll be tired...a lot. Between late night feedings, early morning wake-up calls, and everything in between, you'll definitely be tired.

9. You'll learn patience. Parenthood requires a lot of patience when dealing with temper tantrums and tough questions.

10. You'll love more deeply than you ever thought possible. No matter what happens, your love for your child will never fade and will only continue to grow over time.

Having children is an incredible journey that comes with highs and lows and no shortage of surprises along the way. Despite all the challenges and hard work, it's worth every second in the end!