3 Signs to Identify When a Narcissist Is Being Dishonest

Three key behaviors reveal your self-centered partner is hiding the truth.

Narcissists often have psychological tendencies that distort their reality and enable them to "rewrite history" in their minds. This can be confusing for their partners who may not share these "fantasies." Frequently, this can lead the non-narcissistic partner to question their own sanity because of the narcissist's unwavering stance. In such situations, three indicators may help you discern whether the narcissist is lying or telling the truth.

Firstly, narcissists are usually dishonest when they are excessively adamant. Their immediate, "I didn't do it" response is typically defensive, and their denial is firm and unwavering. This can make you doubt yourself. Even when presented with evidence of their wrongdoing, they may persist in their belief that they are innocent.

Conversely, most emotionally mature individuals, when confronted with an issue, pause to consider the evidence presented. They take a moment to consider the other person's perspective. After completing the task, they will either agree or disagree. The quick, aggressive, and reflexive reaction is absent.

Secondly, after repeatedly denying any wrongdoing, even in the face of evidence to the contrary, narcissists quickly resort to projection. They deflect and refuse to take responsibility, then shift blame onto you.

For instance, "I wasn't at Anne's house. No. I absolutely wasn't there. But where were you last night? I didn't see your car at home. Were you at Dan's? I'm sure you were. Don't deny it. Don't lie."

In contrast, a genuinely accountable person will remain focused on their role in an issue. They will reflect and contemplate the situation. Frequently, they'll stay concentrated on how their actions could have added to a bad result. At this point, they typically take ownership of their mistake.

Thirdly, the narcissist shuts down the conversation. After rapid denial, deflection, and projection, they become agitated and leave. Furthermore, they refuse to discuss the matter further in the future. For example, "I'm not discussing this nonsense again. I'm done with this topic. Don't ever bring this up again."

On the other hand, a responsible individual tends to want to mend any rift they may have caused in the relationship. This reconciliation reflects their efforts to make amends for their behavior in a relationship.

For example, Susan forgets to inquire about her partner's important meeting. She feels remorseful and sincerely apologizes. Then, she sits down with her partner and asks insightful questions about their experience. She focuses on her partner and listens attentively.

The narcissist is usually lying when they transition from denial or deflection to projection and then abruptly end the conversation. Their unconscious defense mechanisms prevent them from grappling with the reality of their actions. If you observe these three behaviors when confronting your partner, they may be lying.

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